Jazmin of "JazSaying"

This is me.

Me. Myself. I.

There is nothing much to know about me really. These are the only 10 facts that you possibly need to know about me. If you want to.

• I hate going out at night. I just hate it. I think it is such a Pavlovian thing since I've been trained to be home before night. I am glad because I hate artificial lighting.

• I cry when I meet kind people. I have been blessed to have met so many kind people in my life. And every bloody time, I would cry myself to sleep because I am happy that such kindness exist.

• I blank out easily. There are so many things going on in my head and reality is just plain stupid and boring. I am sorry if I ever blank out on you. The people in my head need me. I'm pretty important there.

• Socializing is hard for me. What do you guys talk about in social convention? I can barely look someone in the eye. Plus, I can't bring myself to look at my phone because I don't want to be rude. Man.....

• High-heels accentuate my butt. They look real perky or at least visible in heels but having to put up with horrendous amount of back pain, I'd rather have no ass at all.

• Parenthood is not on my bucketlist right now. I do not feel the maternal kick like some ladies or gents yet. I can barely take care of myself when I get diarrhea. 

• I know this is horrible of me but every time someone burns a "mercun bom" I secretly wish that their hands explode as well. Hey neighbors' children, I need to do my fucking work!

• Pizza over burgers. Burgers are too big for my mouth. How am I suppose to get a full taste of burger if I can't bloody fit them in my mouth? Plus pizza is better anyways.

• I collect socks with cat-print on them. Every time I wear my kitty socks, I feel a little bit happier inside. 

• My only life purpose is to be happy. That's it.

I think by now you should know me better than my best friend. Sorry Faa.

Now, your turn. What's your weirdest shit that you want the whole world to know just because? Let them out because who knows you'll find another weirdo who enjoys the same shit as you.

Thanks for reading.

l8r,

Jaz.

I call bullshit: Love at first sight (part 2: others' perspectives)

Let's get on with it shall we?

So, this week, I've been pondering upon the translation of "love at first sight" from various perspectives. And to my surprise, it was 50/50. I did not realize that there are so many believers in this world and I am glad that they are. Let's begin with my boyfriend.

He is a pro "love at first sight" and I tried making it a case to him. I tried to have him look at it from my point of view which he did and he agreed with some of my points but the there was no totality in his agreement because the fundamental reason behind him being pro "love at first sight" is he had felt it before. So it is kind of a religious epiphany whereby nobody could take that away from you. At first, honestly, I wanted to but then realization came to mind, "Jaz, fucking respect other people you cunt." and so I did. Marshmallow, I'm glad that you are a believer.

Now, let's look at the other end of the spectrum by discussing about what my friend, Kit May, thinks about this matter. Yeah, she's not into it. Very much not into it because by saying that you fall in love with someone from the first sight highlights the notion of your love based on outward appearances whereas "love" is the complete opposite thing. It takes more than just the way we look to make someone falls in love with us, no matter how fab we look. Love, from Kit May's perspective encompasses so much more such as personality, character, emotion, manner and all in in all, the entire being of that person. Another friend of mine, Amanda's point of view falls under Kit May's as well so let's just push 'em together.

Let's come back to pro "love at first sight" now. A lecturer of mine is the fucking sweetest person on Earth and yes, he's a believer. The main reason of his beliefs is because of reincarnation when you had already fallen in love with the person from the previous life and meeting that person again in the current life just gives you the feels. Which I find beautiful. Reincarnation in general is a beautiful process, not that I believe in it but it is just a very beautiful beliefs on how you could fall in love all over again with the same person again and again and again 'til the end of time. Death is not a worry because heck, we'll find each other again. It is nice to have that kind of security don't you think?

And lastly, some random answers from my friends who believes in it just for the sake of believing it to ensure her romantic side is alive. On the other hand, there was another friend who was kind of freaked out by it because based on his words, "that chick could be a total psycho". 

You know what, at the end of the day, it does not matter if you are pro or against "love at first sight". Your thoughts and perspectives on it builds up to who you really are and I know that I will still find you awesome as fuck if you don't even know the existence of "love at first sight."

Hooray individuality and fuck yeah. I got nothing.

l8r,

Jaz

I call bullshit: Love at first sight (part 1: my perspective)

I like to write things where I am in a neutral state. I feel like if I ever favor one side more than the other then, the things that I will be writing will not be worth of your time. But, since I feel kind of strongly about this topic, I am going to go ahead anyways. I need to let my opinions be known to the world because why the fucking hell not, yeah? Don't worry though, I am still going to talk about it from another perspective.

So, ladies, gentleman and unidentified gender, welcome to another rendition of "I call bullshit". Let's take a second and think about the first time you felt as if you caught "love at first sight". If you ever had that feeling, great! But personally, I never had a chance to come across that feeling or sensation or whatever it is and for the sake of my boyfriend, I hope that I never will.

Let's start by talking about how I feel about this thing. Well, in short I always thought that "love at first sight" is one of the most polite way of saying, "damn, dat gurl is so hawt I wanna fill 'er up." Which I know is disgusting but I say that to myself all the time. Sorry. 

I think "love at first sight" was made famous by writers because as a hardcore reader and a self-proclaimed writer, I think I have the audacity to say that writers tend to over-romanticize mundane shits. For example if you look at the moon tonight you might say to yourself, "the moon looks real pretty tonight." as opposed to a typical romance-novel writer who would probably say that "the moon reminds of the opalescent eyes of my lover." and we buy this shit. We read about it, cry about it, connected to it and adapted that idea into our real-life. It is amazing the amount of things the media can do to change us.

Love is complex, dirty, messy and beautiful all at once and I don't think you can acquire all of that element from just a glance. What you saw was just the physical attributes of a stranger that kind of fits to your idea of an ideal mate. I don't think it's love. It is just a physical attraction which leans more towards your preferences. I think that is why the feeling sort of mutilates from your ordinary physical attraction thus, labeling it as "love at first sight". There is no love in that equation. 

So, that is my thoughts on "love at first sight". 

However, like I said earlier, I the last thing I want to be is one sided. But this post is already too long so, click this link here to read the next part.

l8r,
Jaz.

Uniform Introduction

Click here to watch the video.

I think I am buying into the idea of uniform. All because of this pretty lady in this video. She is the coolest gal in town, watch the video if you need convincing.

I hated uniforms. With all my guts. Throughout my entire schooling years I was constricted from expressing myself in terms of clothing. I think it would have been okay if I were given the choice in terms of choosing our uniform's  materials or silhouette and remaining with the same palette of the school's uniform despite of how it looks. I think, the lack of choice was the reason why I hated uniform during my schooling years in the first place. Ugly is another reason why but let's not talk about that yeah? 

But today, with the new found admiration towards uniform, I began to respect the idea behind it more. This lady, Chrissstttine, in the video presented that uniforms are a form of identity which I think is cool. It gives out the general exterior on who you are and you could save more (financially) by rotating your clothes. I don't think it generally has to be same set of clothes. I think the fundamental idea behind her idea of uniform is to create a signature look. Which I am all for!

So, I thought I am going to venture into this uniform idea because, why not? I'll get to know myself better. I'll update you on my general outfits for my uniform and I will be honest you if I can keep up with this thing or not.

Chin chin.

l8r.

Jaz

I call bullshit: Instagram

Spoiler Alert: this post is gonna be nasty.

Pictures are lies. They are what you want yourself to see. Not what it really is. Yes, a pictures speaks a thousand words but if one picture is a lie, those thousand words it translate into is also a lie. 

For example, look at the picture above, that is a picture of my back. If you don't know how I look, you would perceive that this back belongs to someone with a certain kind of face that you would think suit that kind of body when in reality, it belongs to the little old me. Your mind wants to believe something else when in reality, it never is what your mind wants it to be.

Which brings me to my topic for today, I call bullshit on Instagram. I understand that Instagram is an outlet whereby you posts pictures and memories for your keepsake however, I've been encountering with a phenomenon which I like to call as the "fucking stupid obsession".

It almost always begins with stalking which then leads to admiration. Don't get me wrong, I stalk all the time and I too, admire countless of people on Instagram. Which in my opinion is a great thing. Admiration leads to a lot of positive things such as inspiration, motivation and whatever it is you wish. But after a while, those admiration has the possibility to turn into obsession where the stalker starts claiming that so-and-so's life is so perfect and the stalker wishes *her life to be as perfect as those pictures she double taps on her Instagram feed.

*I am using her because I prefer "her" as a pronoun as opposed to "him". I am not claiming that only girls do this sort of thing. Boys are just as bad.

I have one thing to say to these stalkers with fucking stupid obsession, those pictures you see and claim as the "perfect life" on your Instagram feeds are not real. Yes, they are not real. Well, maybe they are but those are the pictures or moments in a person's life that they want to show. And those pictures are not even a fraction of their lives. Nobody wants to post a picture of themselves throwing a dirty dish at their significant other with the caption, "I am living with a fucking pig. LOL #mysignificanotherisafuckingcunt" right? What you are dreaming of does not exist and it will never exist.

So, my advice to those of you who are currently succumbed by the idea of someone that you follow on Instagram is living the "perfect life", please focus on your own life instead. You are the main character of your life hence, make it so. Make your life what you want it to be, not copy someone else's nonexistent lives.

Instagram is a great distraction in our humdrum everyday lives but it is not meant to be an obsession. I feel sorry for those who are dreaming for the perfect life for the perfect life never even thought of you.

l8r.

Jaz.

Adventure #1: Blue

I am not gonna lie, I wore that shawl for a week straight and I am not regretting anything. Just an excerpt of my little adventures. 

1) Rare selfie moments. 

2) Parallel wires. I don't know why but parallel lines always make me sad.

3) Skateboarding with loafers on. Fell once. Bruised the left side of my body and my right index finger was swollen for two days. But it was worth it.

4) Bora Bora wannabe because Bora Bora is too fucking expensive.

I will come back with more adventures. 'Till then,

l8r.

Jaz.